She is known as harsh and deliberate, solidified in her position within her realm, her dimension. Her husband, a talisman at her side to assist in her wishes. She is a queen within the darkened levels of creation, an alchemist sitting just within Hell’s Gate. Her title grants her a position just far enough into the realms of darkness to have procured a homestead of operation upon the plains of chaos. She is, and they are, Dark Lords of a certain kind.
She is known for what she gives. What she gives comes with a cost. She is a teacher, but unlike the virtuous. The virtues within darkness and chaos have a different interpretation. There are rules and realities. One cannot walk the wastelands without at least an orientation. This is true for the visitor and the sponsored. A visitor may leave. The “sponsored,” well, let’s just say they require a teacher. This is in all cases never a good thing. However, within the chaos realms, good is just different. There are reasons for everything. In such case, the queen is generous. The gift she gives comes not easily recognized nor equally realized.
Her contracted slaves will learn. They come to her out of a stock that arrives through channels available to few. She only sponsors those whom she hand picks. The subject matter she deals in is akin to the ski school prior to the ski lift. Such a wintery wonderful image cannot be further from the truth. However, the theme of fear remains in both. Her lift does not go up though. It goes down. The school, darkness and chaos. She is Madame, her husband, Sir. There are no exceptions to addressing.
“Don’t move. Let me look at you two,” the Madame orders. “DO NOT MOVE! If you do move, move slowly.”
“Ok,” Peanut replies.
“Yes, ok,” David replies. David slowly moves his hand to scratch his face.
“DID I SAY MOVE?!” the Madame shouts.
“No,” David replies.
“DID I SAY SPEAK?!” the Madame shouts again.
David and Peanut stand in still silence.
“That’s better,” the Madame says in a calm voice.
“Now. Let me introduce myself. My name is Misery and this is my husband Jester. You will do exactly what we tell you, when we tell you to do it, and how we tell you to do it. We are your masters from this day forward. You are our slaves for our own purposes. Is that understood?”
David and Peanut stand silently still.
“You may speak,” Misery orders.
“Yes,” says David.
“Yes,” Peanut replies.
“Good,” Misery confirms. “Any misunderstandings will be dealt with in an appropriate manner. You may simply address myself as Madame and my husband as Sir. You will be receiving directions from none other unless specified. Is that understood?”
“Yes,” replies Peanut, nudging David with her elbow. Misery sees this with eyes widened.
“What are you doing?” asks Misery.
“Umm…I was…” Peanut lowers her head.
Misery snaps in, “Let me explain one thing to you little girl. I am the teacher here. You are not. You will be broken of this tendency.”
“David. Do you understand?”
David quickly answers, “Yes Madame.”
“Am I the only one present?” Misery asks.
“No Madame. Your husband is present,” David replies
“That’s right. So, what does one say?” asks Misery.
David states, “Yes Madame. Yes Sir.”
Misery draws here eyes to Peanut, “Peanut?”
“Yes Madame. Yes Sir,” Peanut replies.
“But, which one comes first? Madame or Sir?” Misery asks of them both looking blankly.
Peanut and David stand still in silence. Heads downward, the tension is felt.
“MADAME ALWAYS COMES FIRST! Is that understood?” Misery teaches.
“Yes Madame,” Peanut states concisely.
“Yes Madame,” replies David.
Misery leans back calmly and gleens at Peanut. “Do you see now Peanut? Your husband has become your teacher. He is learning. You and I will have a one-on-one session concerning your habits. I can guarantee that. There is only one Madame in this house. You will learn this.”
Misery turns on a smile, “Now that we’re over introductions, I like to get things started right away. So, let’s take an orientation tour of your new duties and your new home. You are in training. It is unlike any training you have had before. This is not starlight and rainbows here. This is concerning the under realms, the dark hallows, the mazes of confusion. It is fire, flesh, and icy depths. It is kaleidoscopes of chaotic pain. These are mere words to describe. However, I can assure you, with my instruction, you will know the meaning of all I have said, and more.”
“But, first things first. Let’s go to the basement. Follow me,” Misery orders. Peanut and David follow.
Entering a hallway elevator adjacent to the main living room of the house, Misery continues her introduction, pushing a button labeled 1.
Misery speaks with enthusiastic enjoyment as the lift begins to move, “This elevator spans nine basement levels. The first level is at the bottom and where we are to start. I call these basement levels the Halls of Pain. There are nine levels of pain, each of which are administered within these basement floors. I like to keep the ninth level closest to ground level so I can hear the screams at their loudest. You both will start at pain level 1 and work your way up. This is part of your daily duties and training. The higher the level reached, the more priviledges you will enjoy. You will spend a portion of your day, every day, training in the Halls of Pain until all levels are completed. There is no time restraint to complete this training. We have all the time in the world.”
Misery pauses. The elevator dings. “We have arrived!”
The elevator doors slide open to reveal a brick walled room, large, reminiscent of an antiqued quality. Old this room is, yet updated. On either side of the room is partitioned examining areas, a dozen or so in total, with curtains for privacy, gurneys, and what resemble medical equipment upon stainless steel rolling tables. One staff member dressed in white scrubs and a white butcher’s apron is seen arranging equipment. He keeps his head down working.
Misery steps out of the elevator. “THIS is where you will be spending the majority of your time,” the Madame declares with proud affect as she walks forward into Level 1.
“Within these depths and these walls you will learn pain. Revel in it! Be excited for the opportunity afforded to you. Consider yourself amidst the priviledged few.”
“Stay here,” Misery orders as she walks towards the staff member in white. Peanut and David watch silent as she places her hand upon the staff member mouthing words unheard. The man in white looks up, mouths three intonations, and leaves through an adjacent hallway.
The Madame spins around, “Well, that’s enough down here for now. Let’s head back up.” She makes a few quick hand gestures.
David and Peanut find themselves suddenly startled, standing again in the ground floor living room facing Misery. She is sitting in an ornate chair with her legs crossed, back straight, hands upon knees, intensely staring at the two. Her gaze gently falls downward.
She begins to speak, “I’m not quite sure this is gonna work. Why do you think you are here? Both of you.”
“To learn, Madame,” Peanut immediately replies.
Misery’s gaze shifts to David. “And you, Michael?”
David locks eyes with the Madame, “Yes, to learn.”
The silence shifts into energy movement felt subtly, rising into a knocking vibration of intensity. David and Peanut lean forward in grimacing surprise.
Misery smiles, “Good! No better time than the present. Carpet Level 1!”
SWOOSH!
